Finally I’m back from my long awaited holiday, and got to say once again – never have expectations or you’ll be disappointed! It all started rather comically at the airport when I landed, and kind of got “kidnapped” by the local taxi man who was actually trying to escape penalty fine from the policeman at the airport, and started driving me round the airport while I was negotiating my fees with him!
Then came all the tiring walks, not to mention the long haggling over which sites we should visit. And then it was the LONG LONG time it took to further negotiate taxi fares with unscrupulous taxi men who just refused to use the darn meter. Yeah, taxi man and a whole lot of other people left a very bad taste of this chicken land. In fact now I want to rename it to Con-Man land instead! Everywhere you turn someone who’s pretending to be helpful and kind is just waiting to pounce on you and rip some money off you. At least that’s what I felt at the end of my journey there. I think the one that took the cake was probably the assholes at the go-go bar call CASANOVA. Take note...never enter this dungeon! The girls in there were apparently up to Ung’s taste (BAD BAD taste Ung!!) If you’re one who’s into fat flabby body with manly face strutting their urrgh..breast and bums, then this is one place you cannot miss. For the rest of us who are sane and have good taste, this is one place to avoid at all cost. And they had the nerve to want to charge us additional fees for watching those ugly monsters pulling balls out of their pussy and shaking their fats on the bar top. Duh~~ even my dog would look better up there than them!
Overall top enjoyments of this trip:
1) Replenished my supply of lingeries…definitely cheaper and more designs available in Lala-land
2) Slurping down the nice yummy bird nest for only 300 Baht, and seeing SP go high on that. Weird girl to be getting high on bird’s saliva, but I guess some people do have preference for body liquids rather than drugs or alcohol :-p
3) Visiting the Royal Palace and wat wats (temples) in Ayutthaya. Well honestly I was more interested in meeting all those delicious looking Jap guys that were on tour there - until I found their makeup too faggot-ish and taste of clothing out of this world. Heck, but still delicious looking *slurp*
4) Cruising down the Chao Praya river and waiting for the canal gates to open.
5) Savoring the delicious seafood dinner over at Chinatown on our last night.
Overall top regrets :
1) Entering Casanova go-go bar and watching naked fat ladies (or were they men?!) pretending to be sexy. Word of advice from Lonely Planet, stick to the bars at ground level in which you can see the REAL hot babes. Highly recommended by Jay is King’s Castle, King Castle II, Queen’s Castle…and maybe some Pussy Doll?!
2) Missing out on an authentic thai massage! I really regret this one *sob..and double sob*
3) Missing out on the Floating Market, and instead being conned into visiting another floating market on the canal cruise. Best laugh was when boatman said “In front floating market” and all of us stick our head out to see. WAH….geesh, only one boat floating and that’s called a market! That must be the super con job of the year!
4) Spending only an hour in Juktuchak market. This weekend market is so freaking huge I think it would take at least a day to finish exploring it. Well at least less shopping = more money saved :(
5) Not braiding my hair aka hippy style at Khao San road. Would have been so cool to walk into my customer’s meeting and see their jaw drop in seeing they have hired a loony consultant. But then I think they already know that! :D
Ah well, so that was the lovely holiday. And trust me, holidays are so tiring! I need to work another year to gain some rest to recuperate…haha. Next on the list folks – JiuZhaiGou. Start saving your money, and start practicing on those mountain hikings. This time we’re not making Paul the tour guide – “yao yee sing, mou yan sing” bugger :-p Well at least this time he stayed off the chickens. Good boy!
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