Whatsoever things are true…think on these things

The other day I was having a round table conference with a bunch of my friends, and we were very troubled. Why? Coz a year ago, maybe 2 in fact, we were also gathered together in the same way, and thinking deeply on the very same matter we had that day. What do we want in life? It was troubling to know that we ask this question year after year, and year after year we still don’t have an answer to it! I don’t think any of us were stupid morons, but somehow I think we have just been programmed to continue each day as we did before. Heck I wanted to work part time at the pet shop for 4.50 an hour and they laughed at me saying my parking and petrol would cost more than what I would earn. Such encouraging friends you are!!!

Then today 3 different persons came to me to announce they are very bored with life, and that life has no meaning, love has no meaning, work has no meaning. And did you notice when people keep repeating the same thing to you over and over like a broken record, you tend to fall for it and believe it yourself? An example is my colleague who keeps telling me he has some resemblance to Leslie Cheung. In the beginning I wanted to vomit, but nowadays I see some attractiveness in him. Oopss…the key word is “SOME”. Anyway, why has life become so meaningless to most people nowadays? Even for me I must admit. If suicide was not such an unforgivable sin, I think most would have just finished off their mundane life on earth. I spend so much time thinking about where to find happiness, what I want for my future, how I want to be treated, how I want to love, what is right, what is wrong, where I should head in my career…that I suddenly realized why am I wasting so much time worrying and thinking about things that might never happen? The bible quote that guides me today is the title of this blog – Whatsoever things are true...think on these things.

Worried about paying off your house loan? Why worry because worry is just a guess that you might not be able to pay it off in future. But you can today right? So focus on what’s real. Wondering where you are heading in your career? Well stop it, because what you are doing today is real. Don’t continue to wonder when you will be the CEO or COO, because you can’t be any of those without perfecting what you are doing now. And only by focusing on it can you perfect it, right? Are you suspicious that your partner is cheating on you or lying to you about something? As long as the proof doesn’t hit you in the face, the truth is he/she is still your partner and you got to focus on making sure he/she remains your partner. So what’s the conclusion? I think it means live your life today and don’t worry about the possibilities of tomorrow.

Ok that dealt with continual living, but still doesn’t solve the part about ‘what do I want’. I would never know what I want at work that’s for sure. I just filled in my personal work review, and frankly I have no clue what nonsense I was filling in. I actually just wanted to write on the form in big bold letter “since you’re never gonna raise my salary and this review is just going straight into some filing cabinet, then why are you wasting my f**king time doing this”. But of course even on PMS days, I have a very logical mind :D

Next what do I want in love? The aunties in my office always remind me this – forget the looks, make sure he’s rich. And o, on some good days they might add – make sure he is faithful and caring. Oooo, for a moment I thought they just cared about the money...haha. I might as well be wishing for Brad Pitt to appear at my doorstep, right? What do I want, what do I want? I think at this moment I just want a man who’s there for me at every moment in my life, and not someone whom I have to be on guard with 24/7 and always doubting his intentions towards me. Ah..that reminds me about an interesting relationship discussion, but that should come in my next blog.

I think I’m tired already of thinking what I want. Only God knows what I truly want. Or maybe a certain Jason is right – maybe we should give ourselves time to sit down quietly and reflect peacefully within ourselves what we truly want. Well maybe one day…until then I would look forward to next year when I can gather round the table with my friends again and ask ourselves the question “What do I want” AGAIN! Cheers mate!